Adult jokes

Icefox wrote:

curtiss375 wrote:LOL anyways i got 1 more

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.

At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.

The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee.

She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.

When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice.

When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.

As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you."

He said, "F**k him, give him a dollar."

The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

u already sad it e.e

Icefox wrote:Me/You: knock knock
Person: WHOS THERE?!!! D< (they was anyooyed at me for telling to manny jokes)
Me/You: interuptin cow
Person: INTURUPT-
Me/You: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

AmyLeeXD wrote:

Icefox wrote:Me/You: knock knock
Person: WHOS THERE?!!! D< (they was anyooyed at me for telling to manny jokes)
Me/You: interuptin cow
Person: INTURUPT-
Me/You: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This joke is priceless said aloud

The Pokemon Master wrote:No offense to pussi-pusher but....

Pussi-pusher: Suck it baby suck it
Girl: I'm sorry honey, but nothing is here! It's just a big crack!!

pokemaster555 wrote:i got a joke


three guys went into a public bathroom a weak guy a medium guy and a strong guy the weak guy went in first and heard a voice "im the ghost of chirstmas fall i slice off winers and eat your balls" the weak guy fell out of the bathroom the medium guy came in and asked wat happened the weak guy said my balls just got eaten the medium guy said bullshit so the medium guy went in and heard the same voice "im the ghost of chirstmas fall i slice off winers and eat your balls" the medium guy fell out of the bathroom the strong guy came in and asked wat happened he said the weak guy wasent lieing my balls got ate the strong guy said bullshit and went into the bathroom he heard the same voice "im the ghost of chirstmas fall i slice off winers and eat your balls" the strong guy told the voice "im the ghost of chirstmas past touch my dick and ill kick your ass"